Hello lovely people of Blogsville
I hope the middle of the week has met you well, hail and hearty...
In this new era (Yes this blog is in a new era) I have decided to feature blog posts of friends who have inspired me.
The first of a few will be from my very own Tyger
People may not understand the relationship I have with her. She inspires me in so many ways, she's been more than a friend and has become a sister to me. I can speak to her about anything and she shares my views on most if not all things and is the most enterprising young lady I know. She is also my personal stylist and can be yours too. You can visit her style blog here and her everyday blog here
Now here's one of her recent posts that truly hit me and got me thinking on friendship. Enjoy!!!!
VirtuousKelly
xxx
A harsh truth I have been forced to learn in the short time I have been on this earth is that my friends are few... very few and it will do me good to remember.
A preacher once said at a program - go through life making as many friends as possible and as few enemies as possible.
Unfortunately I disagree with this preacher who is simply saying go through life as a people pleaser. To do this, you will pick every phone call, say yes to every favour, listen to every whine and rant, run yourself ragged to please people to make friends... you might have 1000 facebook friends, and 2000 twitter followers; but it doesn’t mean you have 3000 friends or even 1000 friends; your friends are few whether you know it or not.
If you think you have very few enemies, you are either far away from success or very deluded... infact you are merely deluded, because even if you are far away from success, you might not have a lot of enemies but your friends are still few... very few, simply because you are not successful. What do you have to offer in your lack of success? You are a potential burden, you are likely to ask for help... a lot.... and for these reasons, your friends will be few.
So you are someone who never says no to people, you are here to help! What are friends for? Yes, you will have a lot of "seeming" friends who in truth are using you, you have been marked as the “go-to” guy, the friend who will always say yes... no they are not your friends, they are your handlers and you are the mark; you will loan out or give away money, clothes, your car, your home, your CV, your time, any and everything...and they know this.
Perhaps you are someone who goes through life eyes wide open, who refuses to be used and is focused, with a plan and a destination, people will hate you for the simple fact that you are practical and true to who you are, for refusing to be used, for knowing what you want and remaining focused... refusing to be derailed. It means you will say no to those who want to come and live in your house for 6 months with their 3 children, you will say no to people who want to use your credit card for their business; it means you will say no to that huge loan that will obviously not be repaid... and for this you will be well disliked and your friends will be few.
If you are successful or on a clear path to success in some form or the other, your friends will be few and your enemies many; your so-called friends will quietly dislike you for trying to be successful or being successful. Don’t worry they will still be the first to click “like” on all your facebook pictures and to say “you look fantastic” on that picture where you have spinach between your teeth... but they will hate your guts and root for you to fall down on your face – in their heads they are saying “arrogant idiot! Is he (she) the only one? let him (her) even fall down on his (her) face, so he (she) can know what it feels like” – like you have never fallen down before... but they have forgotten... what is key now is that you are successful and or happy and that is not okay so your friends are few... very few.
This post of mine might sound brutal and cynical... even a little paranoid but in my opinion it is a truth I have been forced to learn and your nice comments and friendly follows don’t fool me.
You can choose to go through life pleasing the world, granting favours that will break your back, cost you your job or your home or your marriage or your peace of mind – it is your choice.
But keep in mind that it doesn’t matter how nice you are or how fantastic you are, your real friends will always be few and it will do you good to remember it.
If you don’t succeed - your friends will be few because you are not a success. If you do succeed - your friends will be few because you are so successful, either way - your friends will be few - even the great Julius Caesar had a Brutus close by.
Showing posts with label Tyger. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Tyger. Show all posts
Wednesday, 21 September 2011
Monday, 12 September 2011
Covers
Hello People!!!
Hope you all had a fabulous weekend?
Mine was good. Went for a wedding (ooh I love weddings) with Tyger and we had a whole lot of fun especially when the live band started playing.
Anyway...Prior to that on Friday I was having a really bad day. I mean the kind of day when your body just doesn't want to do anything, you want to lie in and watch all your favourite tv series (i'm not lazy oh I just like to lie in sometimes *insert what's app not interested smiley*)
Ok back to the gist
Anyway at work I was draggy and all and by the middle of the day I was having a bad headache and was running a temperature and feeling feverish. Before I go further let me let you in on what I do currently and where I work.
Ok I am the personal assistant to a medical Director who runs his own practice on Harley Street. It's a good job but I am believing God for a better job within the legal field. The building where I work in has different consultants in it with their admin staff which includes practice managers,secretaries and PA's. I happen to work in all three capacities (yes I am a very valuable member of this organisation :-)]
Ok back to the story (I digress a lot o). On Friday I just did not feel right. Like I was coming down with something. Lo and behold one of the female Consultant's saw me and said she wanted to see me in her office. I mean Consultant O(this is what I shall call her) took me into a consulting room took my temperature did a check and all and asked me questions and diagnosed some tablets for me. I'm sure you are wondering what the big deal is ba? Let me tell you.
Consultant O is always being talked about as the stiff one. She's not helpful, shes all about the money bla bla and unfortunately I had built this heard persona about her and never really given her a chance to prove otherwise. But her action of friday and the way she was concerned about my well being was very shocking to me and I was disappointed in myself for judging her based on other's opinion without finding out myself. God forgive me.
A lot of us are like me. We see certain people and create covers (I have noticed people don't like to use the word JUDGING. I have chosen to fine tune it so y'all who fall into the category but choose not to accept it will still be caught under this). We hear certain things about people swallow them up and automatically create a cover for the person being labelled. Most times (I admit not all the time) these covers are false.
When the Jews were expecting the Messiah they didn't expect him to come from Nazareth: Oh no Nazareth of all places...imagine hia tufiakwa (Ok kelly remember suppress the drama queen syndrome)
Lo and behold because of His place of birth and the fact that they were expecting more they created a cover for him and chose not to believe he was(and is) the son of God.
After Friday I am learning not to create a cover for anyone. Even if I am told the person is a fraudster or killer I'll try (yes try) not to create a cover for them. Do you know how many relationships or business partnerships or friendships that would have been positive to or beneficial to a lot of us if given a chance? But these opportunities may have been lost due to creating covers. So sad.
Prayer:
'Lord please help me not to create a cover for anyone. Help me to have an open mind that accepts everyone for who they are. If I per chance feel attitudes or characteristics are not pleasing or palatable to me Lord help me not to cast stones but act in a manner that lovingly reflects who you are in me. Amen'
xxx
VirtuousKelly
Hope you all had a fabulous weekend?
Mine was good. Went for a wedding (ooh I love weddings) with Tyger and we had a whole lot of fun especially when the live band started playing.
Anyway...Prior to that on Friday I was having a really bad day. I mean the kind of day when your body just doesn't want to do anything, you want to lie in and watch all your favourite tv series (i'm not lazy oh I just like to lie in sometimes *insert what's app not interested smiley*)
Ok back to the gist
Anyway at work I was draggy and all and by the middle of the day I was having a bad headache and was running a temperature and feeling feverish. Before I go further let me let you in on what I do currently and where I work.
Ok I am the personal assistant to a medical Director who runs his own practice on Harley Street. It's a good job but I am believing God for a better job within the legal field. The building where I work in has different consultants in it with their admin staff which includes practice managers,secretaries and PA's. I happen to work in all three capacities (yes I am a very valuable member of this organisation :-)]
Ok back to the story (I digress a lot o). On Friday I just did not feel right. Like I was coming down with something. Lo and behold one of the female Consultant's saw me and said she wanted to see me in her office. I mean Consultant O(this is what I shall call her) took me into a consulting room took my temperature did a check and all and asked me questions and diagnosed some tablets for me. I'm sure you are wondering what the big deal is ba? Let me tell you.
Consultant O is always being talked about as the stiff one. She's not helpful, shes all about the money bla bla and unfortunately I had built this heard persona about her and never really given her a chance to prove otherwise. But her action of friday and the way she was concerned about my well being was very shocking to me and I was disappointed in myself for judging her based on other's opinion without finding out myself. God forgive me.
A lot of us are like me. We see certain people and create covers (I have noticed people don't like to use the word JUDGING. I have chosen to fine tune it so y'all who fall into the category but choose not to accept it will still be caught under this). We hear certain things about people swallow them up and automatically create a cover for the person being labelled. Most times (I admit not all the time) these covers are false.
When the Jews were expecting the Messiah they didn't expect him to come from Nazareth: Oh no Nazareth of all places...imagine hia tufiakwa (Ok kelly remember suppress the drama queen syndrome)
Lo and behold because of His place of birth and the fact that they were expecting more they created a cover for him and chose not to believe he was(and is) the son of God.
After Friday I am learning not to create a cover for anyone. Even if I am told the person is a fraudster or killer I'll try (yes try) not to create a cover for them. Do you know how many relationships or business partnerships or friendships that would have been positive to or beneficial to a lot of us if given a chance? But these opportunities may have been lost due to creating covers. So sad.
Prayer:
'Lord please help me not to create a cover for anyone. Help me to have an open mind that accepts everyone for who they are. If I per chance feel attitudes or characteristics are not pleasing or palatable to me Lord help me not to cast stones but act in a manner that lovingly reflects who you are in me. Amen'
xxx
VirtuousKelly
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